Blue Moon

Kalimeris: Does LaZorra ever come in here anymore?
Nyperold: Occasionally.
Goosey: Blue moon.
Goosey: a month ago last sighting.
Nyperold: You saw me chatting alone / without a RinkDream in my heart / without a love of my own...
Goosey: LOL

Dave gets introduced to Minecraft

Dave: I think I just punched a chicken.
TalkingDog: Chicken puncher.
Nyperold: Kung Pow Chicken: Enter the Fist
____
Dave: And... I got killed by a zombie.
TalkingDog: brainz
Dave: In retrospect, digging a big hole in the sand was probably not my best plan for surviving a monster attack.
TalkingDog: Zombies don't like swords. You should make one.
Dave: I was trying, but I couldn't figure out how.
Dave: I guess I'll watch some videos now to find out what the hell to do.
Sam: LOL
Dave: I managed to build a workbench. But I couldn't find sticks. And everything beyond that requires sticks, apparently.
Dave: I punched the fork out of plenty of trees, but no sticks.
Randy: LOL
TalkingDog: Sticks are made from planks.
Dave: Ooooh. Thanks.
Dave: I absolutely love that resource collection involves PUNCHING THINGS.
Goosey: LOL LOL
_____
Dave: Oh man, you lose all your stuff when you die? My precious, precious things! That I punched various objects to collect!
TalkingDog: You can go pick it up, if it hasn't despawned.
TalkingDog: Items despawn in 5 minutes.  
_____
Dave: This tutorial guy needs to do more teaching and less telling me about how if I don't learn what he's about to teach I'll die.
Goosey: LOL
TalkingDog: That doesn't sound like a great tutorial.
Dave: Because I already learned that part the hard way.
Maryam: Are you still trying to figure out how to make sticks?
LaZorra: "Are you still trying to figure out how to make sticks?" is the best out-of-context line I've seen for a while.
LaZorra: IT IS SO HARD TO MAKE STICKS
Goosey: LOL LOL
Dave: Whoa. I made a door.
Goosey: Yay a door!
Dave: I punched the stuff out of a tree and somehow made a door. That's awesome.
Goosey: LOL
Goosey: I am glad you are enjoying yourself punching the stuff out of stuff.
Dave: LaZorra: It IS hard to make sticks. I mean, I thought punching trees would be enough. But no, first you have to punch trees to get wood, then you combine the wood into planks, and then from planks you can make sticks.
Randy: LOL
Goosey: Making sticks is SCIENCe.
Goosey: Okay, Goosey is going to make herself go to bed now.
Dave: How do I pause. Does it just auto pause?
Randy: nights!
Goosey: Dave: Esc.
TalkingDog: It'll pause if you're out of window too, but not if you have certain things open. (Inventory, crafting window, and similar.)
Dave: Ok cool.
Goosey: Dave: Also, pressing F3 will show your coordinates, and F5 will change the camera view
Dave: I wasn't sure if it actually paused on the options screen or not.
Goosey: yuppers
Dave: COORDINATES
Dave: Those could be handy.
Goosey: yus
Goosey: HAVE FUN

5-hour sheep

goldfishy: Anyway, I should try grabbing the 5 hours sheep still available to me so I can function tomorrow - because apparently that is desirable?
goldfishy: Night night
Nyperold: Seeya!
Randy: Sleep!
Randy: night!
goldfishy has left.
wintermute: A five-hour sheep?
Nyperold: You know, before the alamb goes off.
wintermute: She mutton be very tired.
Nyperold: Wool, that's to be expected.
Sentynel: These puns are bleating awful.
Randy: You could say they are baaaad
Goosey: Bet you guys feel sheepish.
wintermute: That's not a pun.
Goosey: Says ewe.

It ALL the things!

ThePhan: The last five ChaCha questions I got have been: one about cars, one about fishing, one about a chemistry equation, one about world politics, and one about football.
Randy: hehe
ThePhan: It's like they're trying to it ALL of the things I know nothing about.
Goosey: lol
ThePhan: ...It?
Goosey: LOL
Nyperold: Try to it ALL of the things!
ThePhan: I can't even remember what verb I was going for.
Sentynel: Hit?
ThePhan: Hit! I bet that was it
* Sentynel translates ThePhan for ThePhan.
* ThePhan bets the next one is a math question.

Blond(e)

* Randy is a blonde. Like really blonde.
wintermute: You know that the trailing E makes it feminine, right?
wintermute: On men, it's "blond".
Randy: Really? Then what do I say
Randy: Oh
Randy: Um
Nyperold: You know, someone could say, "Well, that proves it!"...
Goosey: LOL

Tarragon

Sam: Tarragon sounds more like a warrior name than a spice.
Sam: TARRAGON, THE MIGHTY.
Sam: WITH CILANTRO, HIS AMBIGUOUSLY ETHNIC WACKY SIDEKICK!
Sam: EMBROILED IN A PERILOUS EPIC BATTLE WITH HIS ARCH-ENEMY MARJORAM IN A RACE AGAINST THYME!
Sam: (har har har)
Nyperold: CAN HE RESCUE HIS LOVE INTEREST ANISE FROM FOUL MARJORAM'S CLUTCHES?
Nyperold: "No! I'll never tell!" "Then let's see how you endure... THE RACK!"
Sam: "FEAR NOT, FAIR ANISE!" Tarragon shouted. "I'M CUMIN TO GET YOU!"
* Nyperold looks at a list.
Nyperold: Ooh. So this happens at the end of the story: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lovage
Sam: hahaha
Goosey: LOL
Goosey: And so that's the end of this savory caper?
Sam: Yeah. In the sequel, Anise gets lost (damsels being what they are), and Tarragon got fed up, so he married Rosemary instead.
Goosey: Adapted to a screenplay by Cory Ander.
Sam: I love Cory's work.
Sam: Talented family in general. I love his sister Lav's bath salts.
Goosey: Brought to you by MSG Studios.

Happy!! Inappropriate Punctuation Day)

goldfishy: At least the studying shouldn't last forever!
goldfishy: I don't know why I put a ! on that
Randy: hehe, its cool
goldfishy: I think I'm having an inappropriate punctuation day
Goosey: That should be an official holiday.
Randy: That should be a holiday
Goosey: We could put extra !!! on everything without fear of repercussion.
* Goosey beats Randy to the joke.
goldfishy: Oh I put extras on already!!!
Goosey: Yay you win!!!!
goldfishy: Wooooo; ooooooo, oooooo!!!
* TalkingDog uses semicolons wrong;;;
Nyperold: That(s one thing you.d be able to do,
goldfishy: I hate, commas
goldfishy: But yeah I forgot, how to use; semicolons too and: I've never been. Good with colons either!!
Maryam: You're hurting my brain. :-(
goldfishy: Sorry
[RinkChat] The chat room's topic has been changed to 'Happy!! Inappropriate Punctuation Day)' by Goosey.
* goldfishy sits on her hands
* Goosey HUGS Maryam's brain.!
Randy: LO...L
* Randy loves you guys

Weird Searches

Goosey: This one is inexplicable to me: "glass went in my foot and its bleeding like crazy and i feel like fainting"
LaZorra: O.o
Goosey: You stepped on glass, you are bleeding, and you feel dizzy, so you thought you would GOOGLE the problem???
LaZorra: I like how the fault there clearly lies with the glass.
Goosey: Heheh.
Sentynel: Goosey: Clearly Wikipedia would be the more efficient solution.
Nyperold: *rimshot*
LaZorra: TITANIC KUNG FU
Goosey: "gloomy bear damage" belongs on TitleBot
LaZorra: "translate jove to english" -- New King James Version is handy for that.
Sentynel: "Gloomy Bear Damage" would make an awesome name for a death metal band.
Nyperold: Or a really strange RPG element.
Nyperold: "You take 34 points of Gloomy Bear damage!"

Fishdress

Every once in awhile, giant sections of RinkChat are just really, really amusing. We make Sam put these together for us, as he is The Rink, and thus has access to all the chat logs. This and the next three posts are some of the most recent hilarity. Here goes: FISHDRESS!

Goosey has entered.
Goosey: RANDY HAS FISH IN HIS DRESS
LaZorra: TOPICBOT
Randy: But but...NOOOOOOOO
Goosey: see?
Goosey: (7:51:54 PM) Randy: There. I had my fish tank on my computer desk. But its a bit too wobbly (7:52:08 PM) Jeni: Eep. (7:52:13 PM) Randy: So I moved him to my dresse, which is a lot more solid
Randy: It's OBVIOUS I just typoed "dresser"
Randy: Trying to ruin my reputation
Goosey: Whatever, Thisbe.
Randy: That was just for a play!
* Randy has an excuse for everything
Goosey: I bet you kept it!
Randy: Well I wanted to, but it was the directors wife's
Goosey:
Randy: I MEAN NO THAT WOULD BE SILLY AND NOT RIGHT
Goosey: LOL LOL
Kysle: Randy has fish.... in his skirt?
Goosey: Kysle: That's what I said.
Randy: THAT'S THE POINT
wintermute: Are they carp? Pike? Trout?
wintermute: Enquiring minds want to know!
Kysle: I bet Alaskan King.
Randy: It's one fish! A Betta!
Kysle: Salmon, that is.
wintermute: A salmon became King of Alaska?
wintermute: How does it collect taxes?
Kysle: Better than a tuna.
Kysle: Royal tuna would be bad.
Sam: RANDY HAS FISH IN HIS DRESS TOO????
Goosey: Sam, do YOU have fish in your dress?
Sam: Sure. I'm up on the latest fashions.
Kysle: How do you keep them from stinking?
Randy: deodorant
Goosey: Sugar and lemon juice will keep your dress fish from stinking. Everybody knows that.
ThePhan: What if Randy shares his dress with Captain Kirk?
Goosey: Then he can come visit me at warp speed!
Sam: TP: Why would he do that? Just for the halibut?
Goosey: Sam: LOL
Nyperold: A salmon would collect taxes with little wasted time, effort, or other resources.
wintermute: According to ST:TNG, that is how LaForge's aunt trained her cat to sit in her lap.
LaZorra is back.
* Goosey HUGS LaZorra!
* Sam HUGS LaZorra and offers her a present: a low-cut mackerel gown with trout lace trimmings and a flounder brocade.
Maryam: msg nessachan Now that's crappy.
Maryam: Oops.
Goosey: LOL LOL
NessaChan: hehe
Sam: You can talk about my jokes to my face, you know.
Maryam: LOL
Goosey: Sam: Maryam doesn't like the fish dress you made!
NessaChan: That's a betta present than anything I ever got, LaZorra.
TalkingDog: It would look better on Captain Kirk.
NessaChan: I trout you'll ever get anything betta than that.
Sam: FINE. I WASN'T GOING TO GIVE HER ONE ANYWAY.
Randy: LOL LOL
Goosey: LOL
* LaZorra HUGS Goosey!
* LaZorra HUGS MerSam!
Sam: THIS STRAPLESS EVENING PERCH WITH THE SALMON CINCH WAIST THAT I FITTED FOR HER WAS TOTALLY GOING TO BE A PRESENT FOR SOMEONE ELSE, SUCH AS TALKINGDOG.
Goosey: LOL LOL
NessaChan: I'm looking at a list of fish.. some of these are hilarious
NessaChan: Like "Comical Blenny" and "Convict Blenny"
Goosey: Nessa: Really? Those are kinds of fish? LOL
NessaChan: yep
ThePhan: Nessa: That sounds like some bizarre comedy team.
NessaChan: haha yeah.
NessaChan: http://www.buzzle.com/articles/types-of-fishes.html
NessaChan: lol "Horrid Stonefish"
NessaChan: "Hawaiian Squirrelfish"
NessaChan: Humpback Unicornfish
Goosey: LOL Pingi Logsucker must have red pigtails!
NessaChan: lol
NessaChan: Vagabond Butterflyfish
Nyperold: Cookie-cutter shark.
Nyperold: Cuckoo wrasse.
Nyperold: ...Discus.
Goosey: Add fish names to Titlebot.
Goosey: "Two striped Sweetlips"
Sam: No, fish DRESS names.
Goosey: LOL
Randy: LOL LOL
ThePhan: LOL
NessaChan: Pipa pipa Suriname Toad
Nyperold: Another meaning for "cobbler", huh?
Nyperold: There's the shoe guy, the dessert, and... the fish.
Goosey: There is a cobbler fish?
Maryam: Cobbler cobbler sounds... disgusting.
Goosey: LOL
Sam: Maryam: LOL
Maryam: Especially if you have human cobbler as well as fish cobbler in there.
Goosey: Ew.
Nyperold: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cobbler_(fish)
NessaChan: bleh, fish cobbler
* Sam helps himself to some haddock sleeves.
Randy: Anybody know where I purt my glasses?
Goosey: PURT
Sam: Randy: Garsh, yer glasses is mighty purty.
Maryam: LOL
Randy: FOUND THEM YAY
Goosey: YAY RANDY FOUND HIS PURTY GLASSES
Randy: Hey, its hard to type blindly
* Goosey hands Nessa a frozen sturgeon.
Nyperold: Harelip sucker and Hog sucker.
Nyperold: Humuhumu-nukunuku-apua‘a. Say, isn't he in HHGTTG?
Maryam: Nyp: I remember doing some kind of thing in school on that fish. I picked it just for the name.
* ThePhan is ashamed to say she first knew it as the song from High School Musical 2, but was delighted when she discovered it was the name of an actual fish as well.
[RinkChat] The chat room's topic has been changed to 'Garsh. Randy's glasses is mighty purty.' by Sam.
Goosey: Hehehe.
Maryam: I believe the spelling is "gawrsh".
Randy: I concur
[RinkChat] The chat room's topic has been changed to 'Gwawrwsh. Randy's gwasses is mighty pwurty.' by Sam.
Maryam: LOL
* NessaChan is an actual hillbilly and thinks that "gawrsh" is correct but "purty" would be more appropriate.
Sam: CHEF WANG ASK LANDY, PREASE MAKE GRASSES FOL ME!!!!!
Goosey: LOL
TalkingDog: UH-HWUH
LaZorra: LOL
Randy: LOL
Goosey: LOL LOL
Randy: BLING PELSCLIPTION
Sam: ROR
Goosey: LOL LOL
NessaChan: Sharpayfish
* TalkingDog's mind crashes.
* LaZorra dies laughing.
LaZorra: I TOTALLY want a prescription for bling.
Randy: hehehe
* Sam prescribes LaZorra a 2-week course of gaudy gold chains. Wear 18 twice daily. Do not discontinue the bling until so directed by a Sam.
Goosey: What? No grill?
Randy: GRILL
Sam: ARSO GLIRR.
TalkingDog: And pity fools three times a day.
Sam: Minimum.
Goosey: LOL
NessaChan: And don't forget to love your mama
TalkingDog: *snrk*
Goosey: Hahahaha.
NessaChan: Mr. T doens't take kindly to people who don't love their mamas
Sam: Avoid plane travel.
Sam: Sucka.
Goosey: And MRI's.
NessaChan: get a van
* Randy hands Sam a glass of milk
Sam: I ROVE MIRK.
Goosey: LOL
* Goosey hands Sam a "I made it through Mirkwood and all I got was this lousy T-shirt" t-shirt.
* Maryam is now completely lost.
Revan: Don't worry, that's about where I'm at right now too.
Sam: Yeah. This conversation took about four right-angled turns in a row. Which SHOULD mean we're back on topic, but that's totally not the way RinkChat conversations work.
TalkingDog: That assumes we're in 2-dimensional space.
Goosey: That assumes we are sane.
TalkingDog: And that.
Randy: They gave T some milk laced with somekind of knockout stuff so they could get him on a plane
Goosey: You are not a true Rinkie until you can keep up with a conversation like this.
Sam: LaZorra started this by wanting a bling prescription, and then she goes away.
NessaChan: Maryam: Don't flounder, you'll get back on the right trout.
Goosey: Bahahaha!
Maryam: I don't want to be on a trout!
Sam: Salmon Randy are hilarious.
TalkingDog: Ow.
Randy: hehe
Goosey: I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO DO THAT THE ENTIRE TIME
Kysle: Super Salmon Randy.
NessaChan: Does anyone have any diamonds?
NessaChan: Spades?
Goosey: GO FISH
Randy: GO FISH
Goosey: I WIN
Randy: BEAT
* Goosey sits down triumphantly on her perch.
NessaChan: I suppose this can get reel confusing
* Sam has an epiphany! A card game based on the idea of fishing! YES!
Sam: I AM A GENIUS.
* LaZorra just read the buffer and thanks Sam for the bling prescription.
* LaZorra starts beating up foos who take advantage of people.
* LaZorra shaves her head and gets a nohawk.
Goosey: NOHAWK
Sam: Isn't a nohawk what you have NOW?
* Sam also has a nohawk.
Sam: I call it...Regular Haircut!
LaZorra: LOL
LaZorra: MOHOWK
LaZorra: *A
Goosey: LOL LOL
Sam: LOL LOL
LaZorra: MOHAWK
Goosey: Mahowk?
Sam: A mohowk is when you go to get your hair cut, and it hurts.
Maryam: Wouldn't a nohawk be what Bill Cosby's son got that one time?
Maryam: A reverse mohawk?
LaZorra: LOL
Goosey: BAHAHA YES
LaZorra: YES
TalkingDog: I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT EARLIER. Aaaa, spooky.
Sam: Zoey is talking to bug.
Sam: *bugs.
TalkingDog: LOL
LaZorra: ZOEY'S TALKING BUGS ME SO MUCH
NessaChan: I'm feeling a bit eel.
* LaZorra knows PEOPLE who talk to bug.
TalkingDog: Heh. Wasn't Zach nicknamed "Bug" before?
* Goosey pictures a lolcatz with Zoey captioned "o hai i iz talkin to bug"
ThePhan: Goosey: LOL
Goosey: LOL
Sam: Zach and Zoey are each really good at finding bugs in the house. They just sit at the base of the wall and stare up at it. If it's a particularly exciting bug, they'll squeak at it.
Sam: They'll stare at a bug all day if necessary.
Randy: My cat caught a little lizard the other day. Played little cat games with it
Sam: We don't really have lizards here. At least, not so plentiful you ever see them.
Randy: We threw the cat on the slip and slide yesterday. In a big puddle of soapy water
Maryam: Poor cat!
Goosey: Poor cat!
Randy: I think we got more enjoyment out of that than he did
Sam: LOL LOL
* Goosey wishes she had thought of transcribing this. Like, an hour ago.
* Goosey sighs.
Goosey: But know what? That would have jinxed it, so never mind.
* ThePhan has the very beginning of the madness on her RinkQuotes blog (the fish dress part), but lost track after that.
Goosey: I can never tell when it's going to be good.
ThePhan: And not even all of that part.
Sam: I can pull it out of the logs if you all want.
Goosey: Please? :D :D :D
ThePhan: But indeed! Sam has logs!
Goosey: From when I came in.
Sam: Only if ALL of you want it.
* ThePhan would be all for it.
* Goosey holds up everybody's hands for them, so they all vote yes.
Sam: I am unconvinced.
Randy: Sure!
Maryam: Sure, sure, I suppose.
Sam: Nyperold is 27 minutes idle. Clearly he doesn't want it.
Nyperold: Hey, logs!
Randy: LOL